‘What would I do without your smart mouth? Drawing me in and you kicking me out, you got my head spinning, no kidding, I can’t pin you down. What’s going on in that beautiful mind? I’m on your magical mystery ride, and I’m so dizzy, don’t know what hit me, but I’ll be alright….’
John Legend must have thought about Mr. Almost Perfect and me when he coined the lyrics to his hit song, All of Me. That was the exact way I was feeling about Mr. Almost Perfect. He knew the right things to say and when to say it. He had a lot of empathy for me about the past hurts I had been through. He had me continually thinking—could he be the one? Like the disciples of John the Baptist asked Jesus, are you the one we are looking for, or should we search for another? The parallels between Jesus and the Messiah who had been prophesied to the Jews were so close, but not without the trials they were facing, so they were confused. That is the same proximity the parallels between Mr. Almost Perfect and Mr. Perfect share, although I wasn’t facing any trials yet.
The night after Mr. Almost Perfect and I rekindled our conversation; He asked that we watch a movie together. Obviously we are in different countries, but he wanted to watch it, while I was watching it as well. But trust our naija internet na! The thing no gree play! (The movie didn’t play because of poor internet connections) It kept on booting for what seemed like hours. I had to tell him that, it was not going to work. Then we opted for texting instead. We chatted for hours. As a writer, I love to text! I love going back to read what I have talked about with someone, mainly if the conversation was exciting and uplifting. Phone conversations are great, but you can quickly forget what was being said on the phone, after a couple of days, when the euphoria wears out. That night, I got a glimpse of Mr. Almost Perfect’s beautiful mind.
He revealed to me that he was in the process of writing a book (that excited me a lot), he told me more about his job (he is a scientist), he explained that he volunteers at a local nursing home during his spare time, and he loves children. And anyone who knows me knows I love kids. That’s not all oh; he likes the same type of movies, which I love! I remember taking a screenshot of our exchange and sending it to my close friend. The caption of the message I sent to her was, ‘when you both love the same type of movies and agree that God is great, Mr. Almost Perfect is winning some cool points.’ We were talking about a scene from the movie, Lion. And both agreed that God’s hands were on the lead character’s journey.
He asked if I was single, and couldn’t believe that no one had swept me off my feet in four years (I was waiting for you, my Almost Perfect man). He also talked about his failed relationships, and the adjustments he would like to make going forward. Our conversations were not without him showering me with compliments. I soon basked in the euphoria of our talks. It was nothing like I had experienced before. I have never talked about dreams, desires, passions, and goals with a significant other in the past. When I hear people say, they dream with their partners, I am left thinking my dreams are way bigger than I am, they are personal, and they are private. I am not comfortable sharing that with anyone else.
Plus the guys I have been with in the past didn’t bring out the passionate side of me. I remember thinking to myself, before Mr. Almost Perfect came into my life, if Mr. Not so Perfect, had any dreams and passions. We never spoke about such things. But here I was, with Mr. Almost Perfectasking me the right questions, and sharing his desires with me. Could he be the one? I barely had any sleep after our conversation that night, I was elated. My dreams were finally coming true. The one God had for me had finally found me, or so I thought.
Morning couldn’t come any sooner so I could continue talking with Mr. Almost Perfect. We laughed, teased each other and talked more about the things he was passionate about. As a scientist, he explained to me how the universe works. Even if the universe and its majesty were the least of my problems, I was blown away by his intelligence. He is one of the select few, who made a life for themselves after college. With each passing conversation, I compared him to Mr. Not so Perfect. Mr. Not so perfect didn’t care for movies, so I could not connect with him on that level.
Mr. Not so Perfect was interested in politics, and I wasn’t. We both loved the Investigation Discovery channel, but he did not like to discuss any of the stories with me; I always had to call my friends saying—can you believe what I watched yesterday? Mr. Not so Perfect didn’t like to go out and do fun things; I guess because there is over a decade gap between us, he could not bridge it. But Mr. Almost Perfect looked more and more like an angel during the first couple of days we spoke. I recall telling him, that you must be perfect! He humbly declined my compliment, citing no one is perfect. But I felt he dropped from the sky, how could someone be so passionate about humanity? It was as if we were two sides of the same coin. Everything he said got a me tooresponse from me. I went ahead and wrote down our vows in my head. The vows talked about how God must be so great for bringing us together, even on the very day I muttered ‘baba God be a boo provider.’ I thought about the social media posts that people would see, and our former schoolmates, being shocked at the fact that we got together. I was excited about this budding relationship; he seemed so interested in me.
Then after a conversation on a Tuesday night, he told me to have a great week. Great week? Are we not going to speak again for the rest of the week? I know I don’t have a high-end job that demands all of me, but come on; good night, sweet dreams, and we will talk tomorrow will do! Not have a great week! This might indicate a lack of communication during the rest of the week. We had spoken freely over the weekend, and it spilled into Monday and Tuesday because there was a public holiday in the country where he lived. But I thought this new found connection would be an everyday thing.
Can I do this with Mr. Almost Perfect? Can I sacrifice my desires to talk to him every day and settle for just the weekends and when he is less swamped with work? Mr. Almost Perfect is beginning to look like Mr. Not so Perfect, not because of a lack of belief in God, but because he is not so perfect after all. By the way, Mr. Not so Perfect was beginning to wonder why we no longer communicated as we used to. Sorry Mr. Not so Perfect, Mr. Almost Perfect has dethroned you.
Written by Evi Idoghor